He Found His Forever Home; Just Not With Me
The heart wants what the heart wants. But sometimes it can't have what it wants.
This weekend I was scrolling rescue posts and came across this sweet blue heeler. I instantly fell in love. There was a problem though; he was in Texas and I am in Maine. I reached out to acquaintances with more experience in long-distance adoptions to ask for help. As I attempted to learn and navigate this confusing path, with each passing minute I fell more in love with this pup. I was ready to throw my peaceful, quiet life out the window, jump on a plane, and go adopt Mr. Holmes. I even filled out the adoption papers. As I was waiting, the empty hole in my heart left by the passing of our sweet Ziggy last August began to fill.
Then more time passed. And more time ticked by. I kept checking my email every few minutes waiting for a response from the Dallas Animal Shelter on the status of my application. A robo message greeted me with an impersonal Hello, followed by Mr. Holmes has found positive placement and is now awaiting to be picked up by their adopters. I was happy he found a home, but I was extremely disappointed that home was not with me. I shed a few tears and informed my hubby we didn't need to waste any more brain cells on devising travel plans. I can't say this news was devastating, but my healing heart ruptured and began hemorrhaging as the ache and pain - only dog lovers can understand - began again.
Bruce comforted me as I dried my drippy eyes. I proclaimed, "That's it. I'm not looking at any more rescue groups!" He held me tighter and gently spoke encouraging words into my ear. Those words translated into don't give up. When the time is right it will be. Have faith. I love you. You know all those things you don't want to hear when you don't get your way. But I knew he was right - don't tell him I said that. I do believe things happen for a reason even if I cannot see it at the moment. That knowledge didn't lesson the fact that my heart still hurt.
This morning I looked at Mr. Homes' video for one last time to say good-bye and to congratulate him on finding his new forever home, then went about my day. I sat down to read today's devotional from The WORD among us. The ending prayer "Lord, give me more faith to believe that you are in control," reminded me of the words my husband whispered so lovingly in my ear last night. Wow!!! A coincidence? I think not.
God has a way of telling us what we need when we most need it. I didn't really listen the night before when Bruce told me - who really listens to their spouse anyways - just kidding. But after a good night's sleep and remembering that things happen in God's time not mine, the words I read were loud and clear. I don't usually use my blog as the place to share my devotionals but this morning it just felt right.
As 2024 continues to unfold bringing with it hopes and dreams to be fulfilled, challenges to be overcome, and worries to be understood, lets all remember that things do happen for a reason wether it is good or bad. No matter the circumstances let's recall the words written in Philippians NAB 4:6-7 "Rejoice in the Lord always. I shall say it again: rejoice! Your kindness should be known to all. The Lord is near. Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus."
It doesn't say we will be without fear, anxiousness, challenges, and the sorts. It doesn't say He will grant us what we wish for either. But it does reassure that when we go to Him with our troubles and requests, our hearts will be opened to the understanding that our longings will be granted in His time.
And just like my hubby consoled me last night in the midst of my disappointment with encouraging words, the most profound being, I love you; let God's love console you too. Yes, God loves me! Yes, He loves you! And yes, He loves all of creation! He too will comfort us during our times of discouragement, but that doesn't mean He will give us our way. We can only see through the filter of our emotions. He sees the bigger picture. So, when you are like me, letting emotions narrow my field of view, shedding tears because something didn't happen the way I wanted; use God's love to wipe clean your emotional lens so you can see with clarity that which only a heart and mind who trusts in God can understand.
If we can do that, then we too will find our forever home.